Packing Hope

I am sure that this is not how packing a box should feel. It has felt different, I suppose it can feel anyway it wants. But not this way.

Packing my box feel like a journey.
Without...anything really.
It feel like I am getting into a car, driving up to the traffic circle and having to choice between left or right. But I am so baffled and almost horrified by the fact that I have no clue where I am going. Then I start thinking how even that thought has some kind of direction and hope, that all I have to do is choose. Then the road in front of me gets clouded with mist, but even that does not explain my journey because even grey clouds have a sliver lining, all I have to do is move. Slowly. But move, knowing there is something in front to catch my foot.

Packing my box feels or is more like standing at a cliff. Packing my box means stepping off the cliff. Walking in the dark might even be better, but packing my box without a stamp on it is one of those things I wish to never experience again. Assuming that I survive the fall, and not that I wasn't falling before, but that I am falling at a different speed.

                                                                    Part 2.
More than anything, packing a box like this is how I imagine faith to be.
Faith asked me to take a step with both my feet off the cliff and hope that I take the next one.
Faith says  there is  a bridge, its really there, the blind can not see it.
"But it will appear even before you: like disco blocks, like sensing lights, like a bride's aisle."

Packing my box feels like a  journey really.
Packing a box like this is like getting into a car, starting the engine without a destination.
Packing my box is like faith really, packed with Hope. 

Yesterday's Thoughts

Yesterday's thoughts stayed where they belong.
I tried my best to push them through.
I tried my best to remember.
The moment was like when the waves hit shore,
Break down on me and tossed me to the shells.
Then it was gone just like it came.
No recollections.

Seating with a crowd
Reading about my heart in more ways than one.
Then something happened inside me,
It shacked me awake and set me off.
But time still moved
And so did friends
And so did something.

Yesterday's thoughts stayed where they belong:
In the moment that they found me in
In the place that I felt and left them in.
Yesterday.

Dear Word

Nothing like words to hold on to
Words that fall like rain
Seem so hard to catch
Word. Free to those who once had them
And accusers to those oblivious to them
These are the people who are blessed enough with ignorance

Blessed enough not to save themselves
With just an utter
Words  packed with security and death stands at the back of the row
Soon, if not already, his turn will come.

Words, I find myself at your mercy and instruction
Am wrapped in your charm and wink
In the way that you look at me
And fill my quick desire to be present with you.
Words, how I am so lost with you
And speechless, out witted.

Word, word I cant find it lately
Word, word is all I can say
Word, word I have no letter left
For the first time I find myself
Drowning, trying, failing
To blurred out the ghost stuck in my throat

 Word, I find myself without you
When I can not share you
Word, they cant hear you past what I my heart is silently screaming out
Word, I find myself holding on to paper in the land filled with honey
You in the balance for my heart
Word, I find myself holding you
And presenting you to people who do not understand you
It seems I am lost for words when I can not share you.